I'm sitting here at my computer, trying to think of something witty or meaningful to write about, but the truth is I am in a somewhat foul mood. So all the things that are coming to my head are not very nice. And I am sure you don't want to hear me rant. Well, I'm not going to rant, I am just going to make a Top Ten list.
Top Ten Things That Irritate Me
1. Insecure people who try to show you up so they can feel better about themselves.
2. Selfish people who never do anything that is not in their best interest.
3 .Liars
4. Knowing someone's lies and deceptions and not sharing them- either because the person needs to figure things out for themselves or because it's really not my business or often because I don't want someone to be hurt.
5. Unpainted toenails
6. People who are wishy-washy.
7. Missing someone
8. Being selfish- MY selfishness
9. The smell of clothes that have stayed in the washer too long.
10. Being the "Bigger" person.
WOW!!!! I know that was not necessarily a fun list to read, but writing it down sure did make me feel better! After Baby Daddy left when the kids were very small, I sought out the help of a Christian Counselor so I could make some sense of my life. Her very first suggestion was for me to write down every thought I had that was troublesome. You see, she explained to me that although there were things I wanted to say to Baby Daddy- it was probably best to keep them to myself. But keeping them locked inside me was a bad option too. So, she told me to write it down on paper because getting it out of my heart would help me. She was right then and she is right now. Still, I am always amazed how putting feelings onto paper- or a computer screen- makes me feel so much better.
You see, my Top Ten List are things I have been dealing with this week. Some of them are a little silly and others are more serious. When they are all jumbled up in my head, they feel like a load I might buckle under. But when I put them out in a list like this, I can see that it's really not so bad. The insecure person- that's her problem, not mine and now that I think of the situation, it makes me laugh. Liars- can't change that either. That's a change that person has to make. All I have to do is remember where it is and isn't safe to put my trust. Painted toenails- that will be cured Saturday morning :) and the missing someone......let's see about that one. That one is a little more complicated, but at least I know it won't be TOO long before I see that person again.
Life is full of irritations. Some are giants and others are as small as a gnat. And we all have them. How we treat one another in times of stress or irritation is really what it is all about though. Just like my counselor said, Baby Daddy didn't need to hear all the hurtful, hateful things I wanted to say. It wouldn't have made a difference, And in our day to day life, sharing the "ugly" in our hearts won't make a difference either. Kindness, compassion and love go much further than accusations, insults and deception.
Whew! I'm glad to get all that off my chest! When I sat down to write, I had no idea where this post was headed except that y'all were going to be a captive audience to my grumblings. Now I see that God was reminding me of the person I want to be, and how, in actuality, my problems are very small in comparison to others. All I can do in a day is be the very best ME I can be. All the rest, well, it will take care of itself in time.
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